Parenclub

Where does the term parenclub come from?

Parenclub is Dutch for "couples' club": a dedicated venue, often with a bar, lounge area and separate play spaces, specifically set up for couples and singles who practise the swinging lifestyle. In English the same concept is usually called a "swingers club", and you'll sometimes see the same term used in Dutch as a synonym. The term belongs to the same movement as swinging, which took shape from the 1960s and 70s onward and developed in the Netherlands into its own infrastructure of dedicated venues, rather than private arrangements only (Archives of Sexual Behavior, research on the swinging lifestyle). What started as private house parties grew, over time, into a network of dedicated venues with their own etiquette and reputation.

What parenclub isn't

Parenclub and swinging are often used interchangeably, but they aren't the same thing. Swinging is the broader practice: sexual contact with people other than your steady partner, with mutual consent. A parenclub is one of the places where that can happen, alongside a private party, say, or a private night like The Pineapple Club Night. Not every swinger visits a parenclub, and not everyone who visits one calls themselves a swinger. A parenclub is also not a synonym for a brothel: no one pays for sex there, and visitors take the initiative based on mutual attraction.

What are these venues actually like?

Parenclubs vary a lot in atmosphere and how easy they are to walk into. Some are low-key neighbourhood venues with a regular crowd, others position themselves as upscale themed locations with an elaborate dress code and curation at the door. What they have in common: access is usually limited to couples and sometimes single women, and the rules around consent and privacy differ a lot by venue. At The Pineapple Club we deliberately choose personal admission and hosts who watch over the atmosphere instead of an open door, see also our term Swinging.

What should you look for when choosing a parenclub?

Because parenclubs differ so much from one another, it pays to look closely beforehand at what a venue actually values. Pay attention, for instance, to how a club handles consent: can you simply look around without anything being expected of you, and how does staff step in the moment someone crosses a line? The ratio of men to women, the dress code, and the difference between a quiet weekday evening and a busy weekend also say a lot about the atmosphere. Reviews from other visitors give a first impression, but a short conversation with the owner or hostess beforehand usually works better for gauging whether a venue is really a fit.

Examples

Parenclubs set themselves apart from each other in all kinds of ways: a club with a fixed themed night once a month, a lounge-only concept with no mandatory play spaces, an invitation-only club with a strict membership policy, or a regular nightclub that turns into a parenclub late in the evening.

Note: as with swinging in a group setting, visiting a parenclub carries an increased STI risk, especially with multiple partners. Soa Aids Nederland (Dutch) provides independent, reliable information on reducing that risk and where to get tested.

Last checked: 12 September 2026

Want to sharpen the distinction between swinging, polyamory and an open relationship? Our blog post on swinging, polyamory or an open relationship lays the differences out side by side, including a comparison table.